Friday, February 15, 2008

todays view

view from couch inside octane coffee shop in west atlanta with mom on gallery stroll. had orange cake and roobius tea. Homeless and shelterless greeted us on every corner and lead to uneasy vibe on strange brightly colored day. wondering in and out of freshly painted gallery walled rooms and onto quiet streets and sidewalks, smells of coffee grinds and urine intermixing...pleasant talks with 'lonely' gallery overseeers (woah- how does that word work?) glassy eyed tattered lookin men askin questions in a amnesiac manner..."oh dears" and "nice to meet yous" float through the air above castleberry..a woman with blond weave on cell phone touches air in front of my charcoal dress with pointed finger and exclaims "thats a cute drayess!" then continues with conversation on phone as we stroll on by.. one gallery showed various items shrink wrapped in ziplock bags hung in grid on wall. I shook my inner head and tried to find acceptance. One of my most favored and savored of phrases (and sometimes hated) is "ya don't have to like something to acccept it" long time spent thinking i had to like things in order to accept them. I also thought I wasn't supposed to resent. that did not work  very well either. 

day ended with nap and strange crisp dreams in mottled dark tone about being shelterless and wondering the very same streets I had wondered earlier in my charcoal dress, 'cept with  bleeding cankers in my mouth and small dog by my side.  chain link fences and trenches, backs of small shops and bridge underbellies. dreams are like faded memories and dejavues (sp?) this one was eerie and it took me a couple hours to suddenly realize that i was anxious about bleeding sores that did not even exist. just a dream
just a dream

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